Staying Content In The Era Of Social Media

In the 4th century BC, Aristotle defined envy as “pain at the sight of another person’s good fortune, stirred by those who have what we think we ought to have.”

Now, the year is 2018, and social media has dialed envy up to 11. Millenials have even coined phrases about doing something specifically to elicit responses on social media. (Does the phrase “Do it for the ‘gram!” ring any bells?)

Specialists like Ethan Kross, a renowned psychologist says that this bombardment we expose ourselves to on social media “exerts a toll on us the likes of which we have never experienced in the history of our species.”

That is not a particularly pleasant sentiment – it’s particularly more unsettling since it’s not just banter; it’s backed by research. The beauty and purpose of social media is that it’s made the world a lot more smaller. The fact that it has made everyone accessible for comparison is a side effect that I bet even the Mark Zuckerbergs and Evan Spiegels of the world did not see coming.

I prefer a fundamentalist approach when it comes to viewing social media. People are more likely to post only really good or really bad stuff on their social media feeds. This is something a lot of us human beings find hard to wrap our heads around, for whatever reason.

We may know what we’re seeing may not be real, but it still has an effect on us. How could it not, when our smartphones (b.k.a. ‘envy amplification devices’ ) serve us up with fresh push notifications whenever we try to isolate ourselves?

This isn’t even the most pernicious thing about this whole issue. The ‘Incredibly Green With Envy’ Hulk seems to smash everything in his path – including himself. Here’s how: we go to great lengths to showcase our, quote, unquote, “perfect” lives on social media, but in our heart of hearts, when we start to think about whether we’re really living up to the lives we show on these platforms. we start to feel fake – envious, even. Towards our own avatars.

Envy is dark – because it means you do not necessarily want what someone else has got – you simply want to destroy it, so that if you don’t have it, they can’t either. Which is why it is perilously difficult for anyone to admit to it.

The tonic for envy is simply going back to the basics. What is the philosophy that leads you through life? Is there something it lacks? Well, the truth is simple, really.  Logic dictates that if you suffer from crippling bouts of envy when scrolling down a social media feed, (notice how I said A rather than SOMEONE ELSE’S, because, like I mentioned earlier, it’s possible – hell, easy even –  to become envious of yourself as well) there is something lacking.

Here’s what you need to do: visualise yourself in a position where you’re responsible for the upbringing of a child. What values would you cultivate in them? Wanting to destroy what someone else has because they don’t have it, or recognising that it is it possible to not just survive, but thrive, without these things? Would you bring them to the realisation that not having said things takes nothing away from who you are?

The option you picked – simply teach it to yourself. It will do you a world of good while navigating these treacherous social media waters, especially for Mental Health Awareness Month – and beyond. Put your phones away. Have actual conversations. Remember – we are In This Together. You can’t put a price on peace of mind.